[verse 1] oh my god, what the fuck!!! everyone except me sucks all these fucking loser dorks are all shit out of luck holy shit, shut the fuck up! im the best at everything writing, talking, walking, singing, turning you away from me [chorus] i'm a dumb teen girl i'm a selfish little whore if i tell you that i love you just remember that i love me more [verse 2] oh my god! look at me! everybody look and see i'm a cunt but oh so pretty waaaaaaaaaaaah! [chorus] what the fuck is wrong with me? such a stupid wannabe blame it on the government or blame it on the npd WELCOME TO OUR TOLL-FREE HELPLINE WHAT CAN WE DO FOR YOU TODAY, DEAR CALLER???? [bridge] i don't wanna be like this anymore but i don't wanna be like this anymore i don't wanna be like this anymore ugh! your toll-free call time has expired. please deposit 25 cents into this phone booth to aaaAAAAAAAA [chorus] but i don't wanna be like this anymore but i don't wanna be like this anymore such a stupid wannabe what the fuck is wrong with me blame it on the government or blame it on the npd !!!!

[verse 1] and when you die you'll say you're glad it really ends you're going on a cleanse i hate all of your friends "oh my god, you're so hot" until i get myself shot the girl clothes i borrow might get me killed tomorrow [chorus] i feel informal for wanting to be normal it's getting so much harder to not want to be a martyr [verse 2] you show me people like me dying in the streets you tell me that my body is beautiful and unique, well [chorus] you're not a fucking scholar give me five hundred dollars shut up about stone butch blues i don't owe a single thanks to you [bridge] oh, dear computer girl living in your trauma world oh, dear digital princess my raw and bleeding abscess [chorus] go blow out your candles bring light to some scandals i'll be a fundraiser soon i'm nothing but a fetish to you i'm not your harry styles go and doxx some pedophiles youve never settled for less this isnt your stonewall, princess

[verse 1] i don't want a million dollars what would i even do? i've got nothing to spend it on if i don't have you you insisted it was me so you could leave while i was biting at my nails and picking at my teeth [chorus] it could be the last time you tell me to calm down it could be the last time that i'll be coming around my mind, louder all the time my darling, i live to let you down [verse 2] if you care about him that much try and ease him off the drugs cares more about the acid than he cares about the love love, for you, is the hill on which you'll die every shitty little second of your shitty little life [chorus] it could be the last time that we're gonna fall in love oh it could be the last time that i'll be making it up my mind, louder all the time my darling, i live to let you down and i hope your stupid star sign stays in retrograde forever, and i hope your stupid christmas tree sheds needles all over your hardwood floor and when your mom's too drunk on new year's eve to pick it up herself, you spend twenty whole minutes on your knees i hope your car air freshener dies

[verse 1] oh catalina, please don't be a dreamer you cough and you stutter and creak your finish is busted, your speakers both shot and you've lost all the trust in your speech you weren't made for a girl like me i hit you and relish your cries and in my despair and my sullen demeanor my fair catalina has died [chorus] oh, to my heart, you've got skeleton keys the click of my fingers on your plastic shell distort all the beauty from out of your harmonies 'til you're too jaded to tell oh, catalina, i've naught left to say i'd've played softer songs if i ever learned how woe, catalina, a shrine in your name and silence in which i can drown [outro] now that you're gone, i'm heading out west to a town where no one will follow no one will miss me, but that doesn't matter when your keys are still shattered and your speakers still hollow

[intro] seven years after anaheim mayor tom tate used it as part of his campaign platform, kindness is now officially a city value! “city of kindness” became anaheim’s motto after a unanimous city council vote on november 7th. what a world, eh, folks? [verse 1] josie was a daddy's girl, jimmy had a thing about control they'd been quoting deepak chopra in his cadillac through long and winding roads rented out an old log cabin after they'd eloped, for a honeymoon away deep in the woods eight thirty in the evening, she was waiting spread and eager on the bed oh but by the time that jimmy left that cabin, well, his lovely wife was dead yeah, jimmy couldn't stand to consummate unless his every wish was met he liked a girl who followed orders, couldnt stand an ounce of disrespect [chorus] well, i could fake my death and move to anaheim another suicidal poet gone well, bad things happen all the time, jimmy went to prison and nobody's gonna miss him, oh, no one's gonna miss me when i'm gone [verse 2] josie's sister jenny had a penchant for theatrics at the bar she'd been drinking and she told the man beside her to please lead her to his car fumbled with the keys while he slouched against the hood, well he thought his luck was finally getting good she idly flicked a lighter and discreetly stuffed a rag into her drink maybe he'd have noticed if he took the time away from her to think fumbled with the keys at the door to his estate, within minutes it was burning to the ground [chorus] well i could fake my death and move to anaheim another suicidal poet gone bad things happen all the time, oh, jenny ran to canada, no ones running after her, and no one will be running after me [bridge] i want that tragic magic, i want that posthumous green cuz i'm not pretty enough to be loved while i'm seen if no one knows my problems, then they aren't problems at all i want the fame without the fear of the fall [bridge] in her last recorded memoir, before her untimely passing, flemming had this to say: give me that good old fire and brimstone!! give me disneyland or give me death, im gonna be where the sun always shines living large in anaheim, oh, lord [verse 3] so when jenny went to canda she found where jimmy's mom had holed him up he would've begged her for a cell if he could speak by the time that she was done i am hardly in my prime, but i'm too young to decompose i will shave off all my hair and i will tear off all my clothes let all the tiny bugs make little nests all in my corpse and i'll leave you all behind without a shaving of remorse [chorus] and when i finally die, i'll go to anaheim a town where deathly dreams are sent to rot all roads lead, in dotted lines, to every monarch in an urn every pauper in the dirt plagued pirates tossed astern and revolutionaries burned and callie flemming dead, as far as you all are concerned, and how no one's gonna miss me when i'm gone

[verse 1] i'm in hell, of this i'm sure if i could only find the words then i could rid this bunker of the curse we're living under; because out there everyone's dead stare a hole into your head oh out there, life ain't fair [chorus] and if you died i wouldn't care that's more freeze dried food for me and one more verse for the last love song we'll ever need i'm gonna hope i'm gonna pray that you'll get outta here some day but until then, my apocalypse is your face [verse 2] that's your side, and this is mine let's not cross that yellow line absent nod, you sit down and i sit down, with a resting frown oh out there, everyone's dead stare a hole into your head life ain't fair [chorus] and if you died i wouldn't care that's more freeze dried food for me and one more verse for the last love song we'll ever need i'm gonna hope i'm gonna pray that you'll get outta here some day but until then, my apocalypse is your face

[verse 1] it's a regular thing oh, nobody's singing about you but me; how does it feel to be the feet on my grave, the last thing i would save you're not worth dying for, but that hasn't stopped me before you are classical music, you are a b a you are the rhyme scheme we learned in the seventh grade you are all i revile how i hate how you smile but you don't hate me at all i guess i'm dropping the ball [chorus] and the craziest part was i believed it, too oh, my affliction, is this tradition, it's hurting you, and it's killing me oh, disaffection with this affection [verse 2] mother was right about me oh how's it feel to be such a regular thing? oh brendon's not gonna sing about you, all the shit that you do my camisado, if i loved you i'd let you go [chorus] and the craziest part was i believed it, too oh, my affliction, is this tradition, it's hurting you? well it's killing me oh, disaffection with this affection am i still in love with the ghost of my doubts oh, edgar allen, eat your heart out i'm nothing if not ill-intentioned disaffection with this affection [outro] id freeze hell over for you, i know how you love the cold so why don't you go back home nebraska's got so much soul but oh, when the blizzard comes, you'd swear it's the end of the world go and thaw yourself out in the sun pray to god your hair won't lose its curl you're so fucking proud of the image you beg to display oh, go on and contour your brows you're as hollow as paper mache

[verse 1] i fucking hate the student union and don't start me on the gsa i guess it doesn't really matter at the end of the day i'm still not pretty enough for the hate to go both ways it's like they put something in estrogen that makes them lose all their self control "look at my body and my legal name and all my new clothes" not to be confused with the ones you said you'd lend me eighteen months ago [pre chorus] you never did, they wouldn't fit i guess, we haven't spoken since [verse 2] what can i do to make them see what all you people really think about me how could she ever be a girl in her cargo shorts and plain colored tees well maybe it's the part of me that i wanted to take away that i hate everyone who wears the dress without the shame i don't know my waist size and i don't intend to learn [pre-chorus] i don't deserve to be proud and, baby, neither do you i hope you go and decompose in your room, and [chorus] drown in your estradiol all for one and one for all, but none of you all have ever been for me hollow shells of promises from liberal arts colleges that all want a statistic more than me [verse 3] i guess i should be grateful that i've never really looked like a girl after all, there's lots of fucked up people in the world but maybe i'd like to be objectified sometimes i don't feel lucky that i'm treated like any other man at least the losers on grindr would understand i want to feel pretty even if it's just one night [pre-chorus] so do the same and call my name i'm a ball of hate but i can't wait come and stake your claim, i am unashamed my skin will slough away [chorus] like a sad, sad song with a fade-out ending if i linger long enough then you might get me in the backseat of your car and show me how to be a real girl but when the moment's high is through i'll feel even more confused it's bitter, bleak, it's sad, but true i hate myself cuz i'll never be you [outro] if you were dead i'd have no competition i'd never die prettiest girl alive and you couldn't fight you'd all be gone i've shared the spotlight for too long but i'd still hate the way i am i bloomed too late my prime has passed i hate my face and i hate my legs at the end of the day im just a boy in a dress to you, my god is this really your image i bleed, i clot is this really your image? don't send your cards don't stop your cars don't hit your brakes don't mind the sound that i make i twist, i shake, your prius is my plastic surgeon my face, unmade this is the first i've heard of it so tell me, god, look on this broken visage to you, my god is this really your image? to you, my god is this really your image? i bleed, i clot is this really your image? i bleed, i bleed for you, my god to you, you all, i'm still, i’m still just a boy in a dress

[verse 1] here we are, talk about a sophomore slump a billion more basics to fuck up it took me 26 whole months, and all i've got to show is just forty-something minutes of this junk no more text to speech to end the record after two years, i guess consistency isn't worth the effort this was meant to be acceptance, but denial's all i know i'm the same place as i was 10 fucking tracks ago [verse 2] it gets rough every year around december i feel the cheer and spirit 'til the moment i remember i'm a vile little cynic, i hate when people are in love, i want to melt the snow that you've been dreaming of it's not seasonal depression, before you ask it's been building since the summer, through the fall that we just passed it's been all these stupid weeks of me just trying to show some change but i can only muster anger even right up to today [chorus] because you fit into your prom dress in a way i never could and with him, you smiled wider than i ever thought you would it might just be the camera settings you put on your phone but i think i was better off staying home who am i kidding? the problem here is me i was longing for a difference, but i just couldn't see when i wrote this i was off to college in just a couple weeks i'm finishing it now, and things are just as bad as they used to be so go home, callie, go home they tell me just go home you’ve got people there who love you, don't you know? learn to stand your fucking shit hometown show your smile, not your frown easy, right? but i could never seem to get it down [verse 3] i'm not kidding anybody but myself there's a dozen dumb excuses i have shelved but i can't spin using my talent just to piss you off i'm pathetic, and i'm selfish, and im gone.